Levels of Listening

Luke Kuepfer • Jul 25, 2018

Last week I looked at four different types of people when it comes to listening. Today we're going to discuss the various levels of listening.

The first level is simply ignoring. Your ears may have registered sound waves but your brain has shut off. You simply ignore what is being said. There’s a place for ignoring by the way. You may be in a busy store focused on getting a grocery list fulfilled or at a football game seated beside an obnoxious fan. Or your child is contentedly absorbed in another world utilizing the dialect of gibberish. All good reasons to stay at the level of ignoring.

The second level is pretend listening. You act like you’re giving the speaker your full attention but your mind is a million miles elsewhere. Pretend listening is okay in certain situations, like when your child simply needs you to smile and nod your head at the gibberish. Just make sure you transition up when the dialect changes.

The third level is selective listening. We do this when listening to some sales pitches. There’s a place for it. Or if we have the radio on in the background and need to catch a certain piece of news.

The fourth level is attentive listening. We pay close attention. We catch every detail. And most of us may think this is the highest level of listening, but it isn’t. Empathic is. This goes beyond simply paying attention.

This fifth and final level is hard work because you’re trying to enter the other person’s world. Empathic listening is all about understanding another person's perspective. It's feeling what they’re feeling, listening deeply with compassion and empathy.

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